5 phrases to use when coaching

Other coaching phrases:

1. How is your life of prayer?

2. What do you believe about _____?

3. Make up a story about _____.

4. What are the benefits/risks of _____?

5. What scares you about _____?

6. What would happen if _____?

7. And then what?



Top five:

1. What other ways might you _____?

2. What does it look/feel like to _____? What would it look/feel like to not _____?

3. What are you learning about yourself?

4. Tell me more about that.

5. What keeps you from _____?

What is preventing you from ....?



What is your struggle?



How does that feel?



What are you hoping for? Tell me about what life looks like when you solve/achieve ...



I don't really have a top 5 list. My approach to coaching is to stay present to the person and respond in the moment rather than trying to pull from a list that I've created. That being said, I'm sure that over time I'll develop patterns and top 5's in my coaching, but right now I'm not finding the idea of question lists to be a good approach for my coaching.

Some coaching phrases I've found helpful include:

- Tell me more about ...

- Imagine yourself doing ...

- That seems important to you ...

- I noticed X reaction when you talked about Y ...

* Where is your voice in this situation?

* Who has (the most) power in this situation?

* What would you do if you were on the other side of the situation?

* If you had all the time and all the resources what would you do?

* What brings you joy and lifts your soul?

* Where do you

Other coaching phrases.....



1. How do you see God in all of this?



2. What question do you think I should ask you?



3. What is life-giving right now?



4. Where is your heart leading you at this moment?



5. If you had all the power in the world how would your life change?

Questions I like:

If you could wave a magic wand, what would you have happen?

One a scale of 1-10, how invested/satisfied/committed are you?

What don't you know that you don't know?



My top 5:

Tell me more?

What is a first step?

What would happen if you did/didn't do that?

1. What other resources (persons, possessions, etc...) could you call on?



2. What are you passionate about?



3. What's the one thing you need to do right now?



4. Name some of the positives in this situation...



5. What happens if you do nothing?

These are great phrases and invite really interesting ways of thinking that I had not considered before. For me the phrases that really stick out are those that invite people to do some dreaming. "Paint a picture of your best future." "Say more about ..." "Where would you like to be?" "Are there other options?" When you envision the future, what does it look like?"



I am beginning to see that there are many ways to get under the surface and help folks think more creatively and honestly about what they want and how they might get there. I wonder if sometimes having several different phrases that ask the same question might be helpful since some clients might connect better different language.

Through our class demonstrations and triad practice session I've been BOTH amazed at the revelations that arise out of the client when right questions have been asked, and how the coach's listening skills allowed them to ask questions which seem to fall in step with the client's musing...dance steps they take in response to the clients lead.



I feel to 'green' to come up with a Top 5 List already, so I'll give my best stab at the request.

1)

Sorry about the split response...must have (once again) hit the 'enter' key before I was done.



1) Help me better understand your response to X's words/actions?

2) What is another way to express you idea?

3) What would feel like a good ending to this situation?

4) What may prevent you from taking the next step?

5) What advice would you give me, if you were the coach?

I agree with Mary. The questions are deep. I am drawn to the question "What question do you think I should ask you?" This really gets at the idea that the client is the expert! Often times I wonder if others are just waiting to be asked the question they are afraid to ask of themselves. I can see how this question could be transformational. I will put this in my bag of questions.

Most questions I ask are typically intuitive and in the moment, but I like the idea of having some additional key questions or phrases that could be set aside for quick interjections. For example, “how were you able to tackle ____,” “how did it feel when _____ happened,” “what are you feeling now,” or “what’s the plan.” However, I think these are only applicable in situations that call for this type of response.

This question requires some additional brainstorming to develop my thinking and construct some positive phrases that help get to the heart of the issue, something that will also take time and experience to further develop.

Possible questions.



In all you said what do you hear yourself saying?



How does what you just said make you feel?



What gets you excited in what you just said?



What doesn’t sit with you well in what you just said?

1. What would be the benefit if oyu accomplish this goal?

2. What happens if you take no action?

3. If you looked into a magical crystal ball, what would the future look like?

4. What is your preferred future?

5. Where is God in this?

I think these 5 are good. Mine might swap out or add:



1. Where do you see God at work in this?

2. What might be your next most faithful step towards your goal/desire?

3. What mindset limits are keeping you from moving forward?

I like the question, is there a reason... instead of using just why? I have a memory from my childhood when an adult asked me my name and I answered Wendy, why... and then the adult said, Wendy Why, I would like to speak to your parent. This woman was not happy with me and my why question became my last name. So, why does come off accusatory.



My top 5



Where does that land in your heart?

Tell me more

What else have you thought about?

What one thing can you do to move forward?

How is God leading you in this?

These are great questions - I like how open they are invite someone to go deeper. I am still building my list but gravitate towards phrases like: paint me a picture . Say more about that. Who will you invite to hold you accountable?

A few questions that I find myself using are:

What other ideas do you have?

When did you first notice this concern?

What would you like to do?

What is stopping you?

Other coaching phrases ... risk/rewards, other ways to accomplish goals, seeking to understand or be understood, most important to you, and how do you see God in this.

Top Five:



1. What do you believe should happen?

2. What was that like for you?

3. What might you learn from this situation?

4. What experiment could you do this week to test your idea(s)?

5. Who are you listening to?

1. Tell me more

2. Expand on that thought

3. Other possibilities

4. If there were endless amounts of resources then what could be

5. Thoughts on God's guidance

The coaching phrase I find most helpful is asking "If there were no roadblocks, what would the outcome look like?" This allows clients to not get hung up on the things that are in their way and they can begin to see where they want to be.



My top five list of questions includes:

If you do nothing/if nothing changes, what happens?

What is the best possible outcome if you make this change?

What is keeping you from taking this step? and/or Is the new outcome worth the risk?

When is the last time you felt (insert desired emotion)? What were the circumstances? What were you doing?

What gives you life or gives you energy?

Ooooh - 'what's your gut telling you?' I love that! I'm also terrified of it! As a recovering advice-giver, I wonder if I'd be able to refrain from saying 'Your gut is dumb - let me tell you what it SHOULD be telling you.' :)

The coaching phrases I have found most helpful are:



*Tell me more.

*I heard you say "x," ...

*Help me understand.



Top 5 Questions:

*How is it with your soul today?

*Where do you sense God's leading?

*If there were no obstacles, what would you do?

*What needs to be eliminated from this equation to make it work? (and the follow up is:) What supporting structures need to be reversed or rearranged in order to let it go?

*What is holding you back from achieving this?

I've appreciated when someone asked me, "What's your gut telling you?" One of the most empowering things a coworker whose opinion I respected, would occasionally say, "Trust your instincts on this."

I really liked the format of this post--especially looking at the highlighted questions as different ways of asking some of the 'old standards". Great food for thought.

Thinking of my favorites, I would say that I have questions I use a lot ("What would that look like?" is a big one for me), and questions that I keep on a list that I use less often. On my list:

-What is the leap of faith you need to take?

-What outcome would be ideal?

-What would happen if you did nothing/What is the cost of doing nothing?

-What roadblocks to you expect?

-What could be a different approach?

Over the last year, I have been compiling a list of powerful questions whenever I hear them. I have read through the resources pages multiple times trying to become more familiar with all the great options presented. However, as a new coach, I know right now my focus needs to be on staying fully present with the client and not thinking too far ahead. I appreciate the simplicity of the tell me your options, help me understand, what would that look like. They can apply to most situations and allow me to actively listen and respond to what the client is saying without subconsciously going through my awesome list of questions to find the best one. I know with time and practice, the questions will be come more natural as I find ones that are meaningful and impactful.



I like that Jim said he keeps a running list and reviews effectiveness after each session. That's a great way to reflect on how the session went and continue to learn as a coach.

Coaching phrases that have to do with comparison (this vs. that) help clients reach their true goal, or it offers them more clarity on what it is that they want to do.



I sense a lot of emotions in the statement you just said, explain to me what is that about?

How would you grow with this opportunity?

Why is it important to you to achieve this goal?

Who can be the person you can rely on to help you to achieve...?

Are you focus on this issue? or something else came up?

"Tell me more..."

"How does that feel in your body?"

"What's the fear?"

So I tend to keep the questions nearby, but respond in the moment rather than pull from that. I like to ask people to distinguish between options or to weight the importance of one thing or another. I work with a lot of people evaluating choices for their future, I,e. jobs, changes, etc, and I find that helping them weigh them and talking about why they weigh them that way helps them find new insight and take steps to move forward.



Questions I like:

Which one makes you happier?

Which is more important?

What do all these options have in common?

What's the most life giving option?

Which “coaching phrases” have you found helpful?

Which phrases would make up your "top five" list?

1. Could you tell a different story about this?

2. Magic wand questions generally.

3. On a scale from 1-10 how much of this is about your perfectionism?

4. What gives you energy?

5. What are you learning and accepting about yourself at present?

The “coaching phrases” I like have to do with tapping into motive. So something like, "What are you most afraid of with that?" or "What energizes you on that?" are key.



My top five would be...

1) What question would a future you ask yourself now?

2) What brought you joy recently?

3) Who has power in this situation?

4) Who are you listening to?

5) What is your gut telling you? Why?

I think Jim's questions have been helpful tools to start my journey. I've added:

1) So, I'm hearing , is that what you are hearing yourself say?

2) What obstacle prevents ________?

I really like "Is there a reason....?" I have often wanted to ask "Why do you think or feel...?" but realize that it sounds like a challenge or accusation and could shut the conversation down. So the question I ask is either too long or over explained.



I don't have enough experience in coaching to know what some of my favortie questions are yet.

In the past I have asked

What has worked in the past? What hasn't worked?

What else might your try?

If you do that, what do you think the outcomes will be? for you, for others.



Having a few go to questoins will be helpful when struggling with what to say or where to go.